And then... and then... she threatened my poor bloody teetotaler husband with the last remaining bottle... he was just so scared after seeing the devastation from the kitchen... I mean ...I mean whats a poor bloody cripple supposed to do...thats what he said to me..."Whats a poor bloody cripple supposed to do?

"Cop it sweet" I told him and "be happy its only champagne and not acid" knowing my eldest sister...it could have been hydrochloric acid ... strawberry flavoured of course!