Melissa (born in September 1974) Don was 24 and I 20. So long ago Not dealing with this grief thingie really well these days - or maybe I am... maybe shedding buckets of tears is normal - he was younger here than our own kids these days who are 33 and 30... but we were so grown up and owed nobody anything. It was a great time
This was taken only weeks before his accident...you can tell by the house behind us we didn't have much ... but we always felt rich and lucky... and we were; these two kids grew up in our love but they were not able to be childish children - it was a " different" childhood for them - lots of different expectations - not many trips to beaches etc- these two knew stuff and dealt with stuff most adults I know wouldn't have a clue about and I count them as my best mates these days.
The missing of Don is so total because of what he was, what he became and how we were with each other. It was a total thing if that makes sense and thats why I have so much trouble coming to grips with it. He broke his neck in 1982. We were just kids really but we learnt our own way of being - in between and it was as if we were one total human being... not just missing him but missing my other half as if my heart as been wrenched out of itself...
tomorrow will be better.
If he hadn't been so beautiful and soft it would be easier. I think I may have been spoilt by knowing him - when I hear aquaintances talk about their husbands most of it seems to be complaints - and I had the odd one, but could never be angry for long with him. He'd just finally smile that smile and we'd come together.
Sorry people - this must seem to you to be dragging on. All I can say is that if you are in a good relationship, treasure it now - the alternative does not bear thinking about.