Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Again from the archives...these two photos were taken about 1987.

The first shows my younge
st sister Jackie about to do the birthday candle bit - Alison on the right aged 9 and her little cousin are watching with bated breath... at the time of taking this photo,
I noticed my mum sitting back from the table on a stool in the top left and swung the camera up to her only to be rewarded with the most wonderful laugh...she had no idea I had focused on her and was in her own private heaven no doubt laughing at things the rest of us were unaware of. And no, the
glass of wine was not hers... mum never... not ever ... not even once tasted any alcohol - although she didn't mind others doing so.
She died not too long after this... aged sixty six - but this is one of the favourite memories and photos that I have of her.
I know why mum wasn't sitting down at the table with others...mum would not push herself forward and if she saw the seats were full was happy to take a back seat with no resentment and no hurt...


She lived so much in the present having been diagnosed in her late 40's with end stage Cardiomyopathy and told she could die at any moment and suddenly- which was what happened... )she was not found for a few days after she died - something i still have nightmares about), but knowing this didn't turn her into someone who was fearful or felt sorry for herself...the last photo here of her means a lot to me because
it shows,( as with how Don was) that being sick, or facing death - didn't mean being self absorbed, or sorrowful or dark - she still carried light with her. Mum was normally in laughter...she always saw the ridiculous in life ...and revelled in it...I have been so lucky to have such a mum
. I still recall her telling me when I was about 9 not to be angry with people who were cruel because they were "just ignorant".... not bad for the mid 60's. And No mum was not part of the "blue rinse set" she had dark black /blue hair when we were kids - like many celts - and only faded a bit as she got older but retained the blue tinge...
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11 comments:

Andrew said...

Love the photo of your mother. Genuine joy in her face. I can't recall seeing a photo of a person that says so much about them.

Mom said...

What a happy looking lady. I do like your mum.

BwcaBrownie said...

Good Morning TM - you're up early.
Your 58 photo albums should be in The National Archive representing ...
umm .. something the rest of us have not attained.
It's all so wonderful, I am often (OK, always) envious.
Please spare a thought for unwanted neglected 'only children' who are divorced and even estranged from their own 3.
In the meantime,
'In the middle of night, the very early hours of 09-09-09 James Midnight Madden was born to Nicole Richie and Joel Madden.

BwcaBrownie said...

oh cack the 'SPARROW' got lost - they named the baby Sparrow!

Sling said...

I can't help it,..I want to know what your Mum was laughing about.
Great picture!

Cazzie!!! said...

Therese, your mum sure is having a good old cackle..and the thing is, I think she is a little like me..I too see the hilarity in things that others just do not. And people must think crazy..I don't worry about them. Your mum was so right... cruel people are just ignorant..and I add to that self absorbed.
What a lovely post Therese. I have to say, you take a big big leaf out of your mum's book you know. You are special too!

FoxyMoron said...

You were very lucky to have had a mum like that.

Jules said...

Your mum is a diamond Therese.

Her facial expressions portray her minds eye in such an accurate way.

She just gives me a feeling of joy and reality. She is a treasure and so are you my darling friend.

Anne said...

Love seeing your photos from the past. Such a beautiful one of your mum just there thoroughly enjoying life:-)

Middle Child said...

Andrew - She was like this till the day she died, despite having depression periodically.

Mom - thank you

BWCA - Mum herself was an only child but she was loved by her Dad - and always close to us - it would be hard to be in the situation you describe. They called the baby Sparrow - goodness me

Sling - I don't know what she was laughing at but at a guess Mum would be set off by seeing something silly or ridiculuous that most of us never ever see. It was a gift to be her daughter

Middle Child said...

Cazzie - thanks Cazzie - Mum used to always say "What a long life it would be if there wasn't anything to laugh about?"

Foxymoron - I was very lucky - wish i had had her for much longer

Jules - and she was also someone who remembered humility 0 not being humble - but humility which is not so popular these days - thanks Jules

Anne - Thank you