Well here we are,

( he is lovely isn't he??)
Only a little over a month from our daughter's wedding here in Port Macquarie (Australia)... today Don's doctor came to the house with all his notes and Xrays and a very serious look upon his baby face...and I tell you I felt like laughing at him when he came in all sympathetic and "caring" but I couldn't because we need him.
It appears now that Don has had a lot more fluid build up in his lungs, also new infection ...hm wonder did that come from when they tapped the lung in early March...and then forgot about us...
Don literally begged his GP for another CT scan which he finally had done on Monday although the GP said "wait another couple of weeks" Duh!
So this scan showed up lots more fluid, infection and lso a pocket of air which the Gp believed was caused whe they tapped the lung ...in early March.
The upshot of this is they now need to get Don down to Sydney next week by Air ambulance (he is too frail to go by car or commercial airline...) but before they do that there will be a day in the local hospital draining fluid and getting rid of that air pocket so his bloody lungs cope with the bloody pressure oin the air ambulance...
So! Back to bloody filthy Royal North Shore Spinal Unit...the capital of Golden Staph and infection... The capital of aircondtioning vents with threads of something alien hanging out of them....waving in the breezes of air I worry about breathing. They have whole wards of the Spinal Unit given over to MRSA (Golden Staph) and so much so that the docs don't even bother to wash hands any more.
I used to be a hospital cleaner (one of my first jobs) in 1972-73...in a Catholic hospital where Ajax was used, Metho was used, and we scrubbed and had adequate time for proper claening and almost no cross infection so I know what I am talking about. Modern big city hospitals are filthy...filthy beyond belief and proper hand washing is a joke...its all wipe wipe wipe with miracle solutions which are supposed to kill everything but germs are now immune to...
Don's not saying much but I know he is upset...there is a bit of concern that some of the results of that CT scan and blood tests point to lung cancer....so we are just hoping...he wants sooo much to be at Melissa's wedding, to escort her down the aisle and say something nice to her, about her later on...hopefully he will and hopefully he willstill be alive when the youngest marries...
the doc wrote us up a letter for this holiday weekend just in case there was an emergency and we needed to go to emergency... he said it was possible/likely...hope not.
I guess I am on auto right now...

(Melissa, Don and I in March)
But tonight when we go to bed, I will lay beside my lovely cantankerous husband and put my hand on his forehead, chest and neck (he has no feeling past there) and he will use his arm to draw my hand up into the hollow of his neck and we will sleep without worry as we do often.
He will talk in his sleep and I may snore a little (I do not snore he says I do but I do not)...old Thorn the red Kelpie will sleep quietly near our door and all will be right with our world and thats all we can effect... later on things may get out of our control...but now is all any one of us have got...and it is better to live now, draw comfort now, be stupid now, silly now, angry now whatever...
tomorrow takes care of itself I reckon.
.