Wednesday, September 07, 2011

No Regrets.
I have no regrets in my life at all. There are no major decisions I have made, which if made differently would have affected my life to make it better. I was born under a big blazingly hot, bright blue sky to happily tolerant people. I was able to have time to be myself and loved for this, even my choice to run away from boarding school turned out for the better. I got to know my father in that last year before he was killed. A precious lifelong gift. 

 And there was the time when I sat above a cliff near Merewether at seventeen so depressed with what I thought was a broken heart that I determined to kill myself but didn’t and hey look at the wild ride that followed – that ride my life, my life with no regrets. I love my life. I love the happiness I feel not because of certain things but often in spite of them. The sun slithers up the curve of the horizon on the new day and despite any darkness the night time dreams may have bent my being down with, this day is new. I am on the right side of the grass. I have a life to live and it’s my duty to this Universe and the God who made it to turn my face towards that sun, walk out in the misty dawn and just be happy. 
(aged about 18 - the year Don and I met - glad I didn't jump off that cliff - the car was a Hillman Minx and we bought it for $142)
 I may and I do grieve for loss. I may yearn for my daughters to live closely. I may be angry at a useless unaccountable system we live under. I may wish for the light footedness of childhood but in my heart I am happy. I do not have the light-footedness of childhood but I have childhood’s light-heartedness and no regrets at all about the life I have lived up to date. 

1 comment:

Ann ODyne said...

oh look at YOU - haven't changed a bit. X X X