Just received these. : ) : )
My niece Alanah just sent me through some photos she took at the wedding. We don't have the photographer's ones yet... bear with me ... our family is a bit short on weddings so this was, apart from my own backyard wedding only the fourth wedding I have been to in my whole 53 years...
The first photo was taken as everyone in the church went past the couple and gave them hugs, handshakes or in some cases (gasp) kisses - usually really old men like to do that most... This was taken when Melissa realised that the next one she had to greet was her sister Alison. She went from being a sophisticated 30yr old to looking just like that 4 year old kid I remember did when she was really happy... just check out the looks on both their faces. I don't need to see Ali's to know what she looks like ... just seeing the way she is standing tells me all. Its a beautiful photo for a mum to have.
(Click to enlarge )
The next one was taken while Ali was unaware and she just looks so lovely. She is as lovely as she looks also, but very grounded. I always told the girls to have your head in the clouds but your feet in the dirt...sort of like Oscar Wilde's "All of us are in the gutter ,but some of us are looking up at the stars"
So there are no bloody princesses in our lot.... they'd get "laughed at, chaffed at and flung shit at" to coin one of Don's more sensitive sayings.
And this one...
I am definitely going to do my best to be around for these two... I have pulled myself together again, since last post and I appreciate all the comments. I think I was about the lowest I have ever been round that time, but strangely thats as bad as it got and then the next day was okay... I signed myself up at a fitness centre which caters for old knees and sore backs but works on Cardiovascular system....so have started and was surprised...they all looked like me but with different heads...bizarre... could be pod people from you know where... but just deciding to do this and beginning has helped a lot. We are on 4 acres here and the way things grow right now its not as if I was sitting about moping... there are always lots of things to do so that the bush doesn't take over the house... but till I work out what to do with myself... I needed to do more physically and seemed to lack motivation.
We had been in a Carer/ Cared for situation for 25 years and much of the time I needed to be responsible all the time just in case. I have always hated the term "Carer" because so many paid ones are bastards...we were wife and husband...but just to explain, when the person you care for and love in the way we did is gone, it is worse than getting the sack or retiring because it was not just your Monday to Friday 9 to 5... it was your life so along with the loss there is a different loss. We really enjoyed our time together and too many people assume too easily that they know what it is like to be in our situation. I have been told "Oh! You must be relieved." Too stunned to react...we always think about what we'd say if we were quick enough. A bloody good smack in the mouth might suffice forthat person who was looking at me myopically just like social workers do...they all seem to be short sghted also. They look at you right in the face and stand too close as if that means they care... One eejit down in Sydney Hospital did that but she had a lazy eye and I am sure no one ever told her that the closer she got the more that other eye danced around inside its socket while the other one looked straight at you. Still makes me laugh.
All our kids are special but these two are extra. Aged four Alison the size of a peanut stood in front of her dad's manual (then) wheelchair after it got away from me on a slope and she stopped it with her own little body (unhurt both of them) ...Melissa still a child had to push him and his elextric chair (they had 2 car batteries underneath in those days and very heavy) up a long incline after he got the control box wet right down the back of the yard. My mum was there but she was too frail at that time...His chair had started to short out and went round and round till he lodged up against a barbed wire fence and the wheels still spinning. She sorted out all of that ( no mean feat) got it into manual which meant you push it...and got him safely in the house.
I am amused when people treat their children as babies at 7 and 6 and all of that. We hugged ours a lot and had a lot of fun, and we spoilt them occasionally but there was no choice sometimes but for them to be brave or inventive or whatever. They are better people for this, not that this was necessary...
Don and I managed to survive their teenage years when they both had sparks in their eyes and sparks in their hearts (and thats a dangerous mix) ... and now its just beautiful with them and has been for some years now... I am actually a very lucky person...we were very lucky people and we felt this at the time which is more important.