Friday, December 04, 2009

Here I am aged 20, with four month old Melissa...

outside my mother's old house in country NSW
unmarried...
unashamed... it was the 70's after all - what was there to be ashamed of?
in love with her dad...

My amazing mum, actually practised what her religion preached...unlike too many others from the religious communities... who worried more about what the world would think of them... and not about what god would think of them.

She had said to me aged about 15, "if ever you get pregnant you can always come home and you will be welcome as well as your baby" That sticks in my brain...A precious gentle blanket to cast on any daughter's shoulders. If more of the world was like my mum we would live in a wonderful way... she was too busy laughing, giving and loving to mind anybody's business.

Mum had nothing really financially...Dad had been killed leaving her with four of us still at home. Her old house needed paint and much more as well...but she taught me the lesson that just because you have nothing, doesn't mean you have to be mean minded and a victim. But as well i learned that often its those who have the least who are the first to help and offer help without a cost being put on it.

I did come home for many holidays, but just to show mum my amazing treasure and she was as besotted as any proud Grannie. Don and I married four years later after I asked him...as said...it was the 70's...

When Don had his accident in 1982...it was mum who minded Melissa in the early months of his 7 month hospitalisation. She had to go to school and i was living out of a suitcase at the time not knowing where I would be the next week...Mum provided stability for Melissa and peace of mind for me. Melissa said she was so happy there, and that my mum told her stories and played on the floor of the lounge room with tents made out of sheets and chairs...

Sometimes when it appears to others that you are not lucky... life gives you the gifts of good people about you to ameliorate your condition...and so a balance is struck.
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6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great post MC. Your mother must have been pretty special.

Cazzie!!! said...

What a gorgeous photo!
I love this story, it is so true that people don;t often see what they have right in front of them. Playing under sheets as cubbies and laying on the floor, itis what I do, because my Gramdma did it with me. Unfortunately our children's grandparent's don't do it with them and so it is we the parents and the children's Au Pair who does it with them. For that, I think our kids are lucky. Playing with imagination is wonderful.
At the moment, the girls are playing in a plasma telly box.. donated by my sister, I am about to go knock on their door and offer them some pretent tea and biscuits.
We are just going off to look at chistmas lights too... in about 20 minutes, once we have finished playing.
You know, today at work on the Oncology ward, I got to see some lovely relatives binding together to make the journey a little lighter for each other. THAT is sure what being there for each other is about.
Your Mum is a wonderful person!

Mom said...

You are blessed to have had a wonderful mum.

Middle Child said...

Andrew she was that...against all the odds life lay at her feet.


Cazzie - the secret is never to forget to be childlike as opposed to childish.Too many old people become childish and narrow...the others are childllike and wise.

Sadly mu mum died suddenly aged 66 in 1993 - only 11 years older than what i am now.

Mom I am and also had just as wonderful a dad...who also liked to play but didn't know what to do when we became teenage girls... poor dad

Random Thinker said...

Good Moms are like comforting blankets aren't they?

Mal Kiely [Lancelots Pram] said...

Love it. Good on you, ma'am :)